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Learn how you can win the lottery and what you can do with the money in just ten easy steps!

1.) Move to some rural town no one has everĀ  heard of

2.) Get a job at a factory

3.) Make friends with 8 other factory workers and go in on buying a lottery ticket together

4.) Buy a pair of sunglasses left over from the ’80’s or ’90’s

5.) Look up what a lawyer is cuz you heard you may need one if you win

6.) Overeat. Constantly.

7.) Win the lottery

8.) Hire the lawyer you saw handing out flyers at Wal-Mart

9.) Accept all calls from your long lost family members

10.) Watch your life become worse than it was to begin with because you have no idea how to manage money whether it’s $50 or $5 million. Congrats!

Pet Peeve of the Day: People who want to win the lottery

Quote of the Day: “I’m a great believer in luck, and I find that the harder I work, the more I have of it.” –Thomas Jefferson

Thoughts?
  • Spot on (3)
  • Legendary (2)
  • Awesome (3)
  • I can dig it (10)
  • WTF (6)