President Obama’s appearance on the Daily Show (which I do not watch nor did I watch that episode except today on YouTube) last night roiled me to the point of finally pulling the trigger. I need to purchase my anti-Obama bumper sticker at last. I don’t need a joke of a president who goes on Comedy Central to appease his minions and try to maintain that rock start image he has thus far relied upon. Really, you have time in your schedule for THAT? The problem is, the joke is on us America. Now, there are SO many good bumper stickers out there. PLEASE, help me decide! Practice for 11/2 and VOTE below!

Option A:

Option B:

Option C:

Option D:

Option E (and my all time favorite, this was the OG of anti-Obama stickers):

All bumper stickers can be found at Cafe Press.

So which one is it gonna be??

Pet Peeve of the day: Getting denied healthcare. Thanks Obama. You nailed that one.

Quote of the Day: “Yes we can . . . BUT . . . it’s not going to happen overnight.” –President Barack Obama, 10/27/10

I give you my new fall jam, which was actually given to ME by the wondrous app that is SHAZAM. You just hold up your phone to a song that is playing and it tells you what it is. No more hearing this song on the radio constantly and not knowing what it is! Sweet! (And you will also note the amount of non-hipster facial hair of the majority of the band members–SWEETER!)

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And who DOESN’T want to watch a cat play Duck Hunt?

Things I Live For: Starbucks  instant coffee

Quote of the Day: ”Ain’t it just like the night to play tricks when you’re trying to be so quiet– we sit here stranded though we all do our best to deny it.” –Bob Dylan

Oh yes, I take requests. A friend of mine suggested vanity plates for a blog topic and there is nothing I like more than responding to requests.

What is it about the vanity plate? According to my Jersey-born, Philly identifying cousin, vanity plates do not exist on the east coast, or at least to the extent which we see them here in the midwest, specifically Illinois and Wisconsin. They enrage him as they do my friend who says that “people should be embarrased.” Except, I had to point out to her: anyone who has a vanity plate thinks WAY too highly of themselves to  be embarrased!

So I thought, why ARE vanity plates so popular here? A quick Google search of vanity plates immediately suggested that I must have meant “vanity plates Illinois.” Which brings me to the website of the Secretary of State who is ENCOURAGING THIS. There is an interactive tool where you can type out what you want on your plate and immediately see if it is available. (If you are bored at work this is actually quite entertaining…) Unfortunately “Awesome” is taken, shocker I know. So it looks like Illinois has their Secretary of State to blame, Mr. Jesse White. But I wasn’t fond of him to begin with as he allowed my grandmother to drive wayyyyyy past her prime.

People with vanity plates think they are beyond clever. Usually they point to the person’s profession, for example a doctor would have “I Heal,” and an accountant “Add it Up” or something dumb like that. BFD. No one cares. The only thing I care about you at that moment on the road is that you not drive like a fucking idiot. But that is ALWAYS too much to ask from a vanity plate possessor.

I must admit that growing up, my parents had a vanity plate. It was “Rock C;” they were obsessed with Roxy Music. I don’t know if it’s because I love Roxy Music too, or that I love my parents, but I must admit that plate was awesome.

The worst plates however are those that declare “I’m Sexy” or “2 Hott.” Really? You think I’m NOT gonna cut you off with an attitude like that? I mean really people—vanity plates just encourage and add to road rage. I have no idea why the secretary of state would promote these (aside from the obvious, being money).

If people spent as much time on themselves as they do thinking of a vanity plate, then humanity as a whole may just improve. Until then, we’ll be driving amongst some of the most self-involved people in the world–not exactly the type you want behind a wheel.

What’s the worst vanity plate you have ever seen?

Dedicated to: Lena

Quote of the Day: “I wasn’t born with a plastic spoon in my mouth.” –Eric Cartman

Holier then the holiest of rollers, and certainly holier than thou, I give you atheists. They KNOW things whereas us believers just BELIEVE things. And they are adamant about this and will let you know. But how are they so sure that I’m some idiot because I believe in a higher power and engage in organized religion?

The answer may indeed be opposable thumbs. And I’m totally with them on that because goddamn if I don’t love my opposable thumbs. But why can’t I believe in evolution and God?

Mark Twain said “faith is believing what you know ain’t so.” I like this quote because I think it mirrors the complexities that comprise faith. Now, we could get stoned and talk about this quote for hours but we won’t at the moment. But I believe atheists lack faith–they have no faith in anything. And to me, that is sad. Yes, I have little faith in humanity, but I still have a LITTLE. I presume they have none because they need EVIDENCE for everything. Apparently a lengthy book is not good enough. That’s fine. Live your life like that. But I’m not gonna come to your little hipster pad and protest your choice to be an atheist so don’t

A man in my class the other day stated how he had to go to church at Christmas because it made his parents happy. But he relayed to the class what a maddening experience that was for him. Well what about how maddening it was for the fellow congregants to have to worship in the midst of someone who looks down on them and laughs at what they stand for? And to be honest buddy, if, at 38 years old, you’re going to church, doing something you hate to “make your parents happy” I’d say your issues run way deeper than organized religion and Yahweh.

Do atheists have an aversion to all art that depicts or discusses religion? Because wow are you guys not only really ignorant to the rights of others but also really culturally deprived.

So atheists–check yourselves. Or, you may want to take a page from our Book and learn a little bit about acceptance. Or maybe go off to some far end of the world with all your Democrat friends who also know that their way is the right way and fucking kick rocks.

Pet Peeve of the Day: See above

Quote of the Day: “Grace is all I’m asking, when will grace return” –Dave Matthews