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Driving into work the other day, I spotted a Jeep with the ubiquitous sticker declaring “It’s a Jeep Thing…You Wouldn’t Understand.” I haven’t seen one of these in awhile so it brought me back to questions I have previously pondered.

First and foremost, what is it that I do not understand? Is it that you are a douchebag? Because I get that. Loud and clear.

Perusing the information super-highway, I discovered a site to purchase said sticker. I figured this site would at least give me some information on what it is I need to understand. Except the description reads: “Yup, It’s a Jeep Thing, and most people don’t understand. But YOU do, so celebrate that knowledge.” Okay, not so helpful.

Maybe it’s just a really tricky PR stunt–buy a Jeep and you will suddenly be filled with knowledge on how to totally suck at life. (I hope that PR genius was fired. Actually, they probably have a new job–their the brain trusts behind the new Cubs slogan “It’s a “W”ay of Life.” Again, if sucking at life is a way of life then I’m all in…)

And why must these stickers cover the expanse of the dashboard? They’re never simple little bumper stickers–they are windshield stickers. As if your douchiness doesn’t blind you enough, you need to add a large decal to the mix?

Clearly, for some reason unbeknowest to me, Jeep drivers think they are the shit. To you and me, that means compensating for all the other areas in life which they fail.

If I ever obtain my dream of owning a wood-paneled station wagon, you bet your ass I’ll find myself a sticker declaring “It’s a wood-paneled station wagon from the 80’s thing…You Wouldn’t Understand.”

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  1. raygun on 2010.06.15

    Not a bumper sticker but a T-shirt at Wrigley:

    :What did jesus say to the Cubs?

    Don’t do anything til I get back!”

    That is AWESOME!

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